Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Let's paint friendship bongs
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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