My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
