you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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