All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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