he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
