I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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