Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
