How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
