first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
My liver just broke up with me...
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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