and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize