Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
