this boner is exhausting
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
