the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
