My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
