I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
honey bunches of taint.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
