dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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