is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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