I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
27 Drunk People That Pissed Off The Cops And Got What They Deserved
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear