The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize