Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
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just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize