Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Of course I have a pirate flag
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
