I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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