Kiss
Puke
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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