awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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