I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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