we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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