easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize