Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
