Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Dick very happy bro
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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