everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
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I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
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its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
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