She's JV to your varsity
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
