Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
