Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
