We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
