The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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