jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
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