I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize