Already got asked if we're dating
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize