what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
nutella sex= disaster
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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