2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
