these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
