She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
