Need sex. Gaining weight.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
