Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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