bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
