i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
