Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize