Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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