need another drink. this is the easiest way
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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