Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
